Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Appreciate Being A Parent

Appreciate Being a Parent


As we go about our very busy schedules-we often overlook the tiny moments-the small unnoticed delights of being a parent. Here are some ways to appreciate the joys of being a mom or a dad.


Instructions


1. Stay out of parental mindset. We spend too much time regretting the past and worrying about the future. We overthink what might have been and try to control what could be. This overthinking saps the joy of having children around. You can't smell the sweetness of a baby right after her bath if you're worrying about getting the kitchen cleaned up. You can't delight in the sweet song of a first grade choir if focused on the work on your desk.


2. Be present. "Could have" and "should have" and "if only" are thoughts that take away from the happiness that comes with being a parent. Children are lively. They live in the moment. We can learn something from watching how easily they skip, run and play. There's never a dull hour when a child is around. Be present. Watch your child wiggle, notice innocence. Clear your schedule, your mind, your "to-do list" and really be present.


3. Skip over the small stuff. Children grow quickly and leave home soon enough. The wet towels on the bathroom floor may be annoying; the toys on the floor may get in the way, but there will be plenty of time for cleaning the house when they're grown up and moved away. If you must clean the house, ask them to pitch in, and be sure to make the cleaning fun.


4. Accept innocent love. Your child loves you unconditionally. Even when you let them down, which you probably will, they'll forgive you quickly. They see your mistakes and they let them go. Children are very trusting. They depend on you. They want your approval and acceptance more than you know.


5. Say "I love you" daily. Never, ever leave your child angry or upset. Make the generous gesture and put aside the lecture. Comfort willingly when they're troubled. Admit when you're wrong. Notice the look on their face that says, having a bad day. Put down your newspaper, shut down the computer and ask what you can do. There are never too many "I love you's."


6. Acknowledge the sacrifice. There are many sacrifices that come with being a parent. Most parents put the child's needs above their own, and this is as it should be. Once you have a child, you're changed; you are no longer the same person. Now everything you do is done with your child in mind. This is difficult. The rewards are bigger. Acknowledge to yourself and your partner the sacrifices made. Feel good about doing a good job of parenting.


7. Believe. A child who has the backing of a parent will have what it takes to meet life's challenges. Think of the power you have. You've created a person who hopefully will take the best of you, improve on it and become better. The legacy you leave will be reflected in the life of your child. Believe in your child completely. Tell your child often, "I believe in you."


8. Ask yourself: "What better than being a parent?" Parenting is not always fun, but children are a joy. When you are old and grey, consider what will matter most.