Proper etiquette is part of polite society.
A cotillion is a formal ball, often associated with presenting debutantes to society. It is also a program combining classes, parties and dance to educate young people in the social graces, including proper and formal etiquette. Such etiquette shows respect for others and is beneficial to succeeding in today's competitive society, according to the Charlotte, North Carolina chapter of the National Etiquette and Cotillion Association. Read on to see what etiquette is customary at a cotillion.
Greetings and Introductions
A cotillion begins with politely greeting others and making and receiving formal introductions such as "Miss Jones, may I present Mr. Smith?" and "Dr. Brown, may I present Judge Hall?" Upon introduction, gentlemen shake hands. Although a lady may choose to extend her hand, she usually nods and offers a pleasant greeting.
Table Etiquette
Cotillions adhere to long-established decorum such as knowing which utensils to use for each course of the meal as well as cut food, hold a glass and where to place napkins. A cotillion's code of etiquette also promotes showing cordial behavior to the serving staff and being respectful of other guests by not talking or chewing with a full mouth of food, resting elbows on the table or leaving dining companions without excusing oneself.
Conversation Etiquette
Whether at the dining table, on the dance floor or mingling with other guests, polite and pleasant conversation is the protocol at a cotillion. Gossip, off-color humor, controversial topics and boisterous laughter are not acceptable at these formal events, as is avoiding small talk, monopolizing people's time and talking on or sending text messages on a cell phone instead of communicating face to face with other guests.
Dance Floor Etiquette
Dancing at a cotillion does not mandate the skills of Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, but cotillions stick to the time-honored etiquette that couples conform to good taste while on the dance floor. Suggestive moves and public displays of affection are out of place at a cotillion. Besides dancing appropriately, respectful manners are also displayed through a courteous approach if requesting a dance with someone's partner and by not attempting to be the only name on someone's dance card. This is especially true at a cotillion, where it is traditional for a certain person, such as a debutante, to dance with many different people. While it is fine for a couple to take pride in their dancing skills, showing off, overtaking the dance floor and refusing to dance with someone less adept is rude by all etiquette standards.
Parting Words
Thanking the host and hostess and complimenting them on the cotillion is a gracious act and one that is generally expected by those presenting the event. The rules of etiquette are to do this in person before leaving the cotillion and afterwards through a handwritten thank you note.
